My wonderful partner took the kids away this weekend to spend some Quality Time with Grandma and Grandad (and, more importantly, Grandma’s puppy). I was left to my own devices, with strict instructions to relax and find some inner peace already. I confess I’ve not been functioning at anywhere near my best for quite a horribly long time now, so this was a great opportunity to stop playing Blind Man’s Buff with my life and get my mojo back.
I started my weekend by thinking on one quote from the ever-inspiring Eleanor Roosevelt;
“Do one thing every day that scares you.”
Doing nothing scares me. Wasting time scares me. Not getting everything done scares me.
But I ended up my weekend with quite a different quote, although also from Eleanor. More on that at the end, but what of my three (yes, a three-day weekend, ain’t it great?) days alone? I think I can sum it up in two lists.
What I did this weekend:
- Lay in the sunshine in the Botanical Gardens.
- Went to my first Rollerderby bout
- Walked in the park
- Did my embroidery in the Botanical Gardens
- Watched a mediocre film
- Cleaned the bathroom
- Made lemon chocolate brownies
- Untangled my life-plan
- Went to an art exhibition I thought I wouldn’t like
- Ate Chicken Kiev
- Remembered what’s really important. And what really isn’t.
What I didn’t do this weekend:
- Worry about being back in time to do dinner
- Worry about heading home from the park before the kids got tired and fractious
- Tidy the house
- Stop my day at regular intervals to make sure everyone gets breakfast/snack/lunch/dinner/a drink
- Feel guilty about wasting a good evening watching a mediocre film
- Check the vegetarians/chicken-carers didn’t mind me eating the flesh of a slaughtered hen
- Keep checking the time
- Grocery shopping, with or without children in tow
- Sort out any arguments
- Make sure I only did/saw/went to things I knew would be brilliant, because anything else would a waste of valuable babysitting
- Keep my head so full of mundane, essential tasks there was no room for anything else.
Yeah. Now that’s inner peace already. I know where I’m going now. Still not entirely sure how I’ll get there, but hey, I only had three days, I think I did pretty well!
“I think that somehow, we learn who we really are and then live with that decision.”