I’ve been meaning to share this for a while;  here’s a little game for you.  Do you hate crowds?  Does the idea of shopping on a Saturday, bumping around with the consuming masses, getting stuck behind slow people, getting pushed out of the way by impatient people, fill you with despond?  Yeah well, me too.  But ‘Splitting’ can make walking with the hoi polloi a bit more bearable – hey, maybe even fun, it depends on your entertainment threshold.

It is usually a private game, played inside your own head,  and the rules are simple.  Split people up without them realising.  For example, you’re walking towards a couple of friends, or a group of teenagers.  Keep walking, in a purposeful way, and walk between them.  You’ve split!  Obviously you can’t barge people, that would be rude – and cheating;  just walk  purposefully enough that they automatically, subconsciously, part to allow you through.

Allow yourself a little private Yesss in your head, and keep going.  Now, some people will not split, they will subconsciously decide that it is you who must walk round them, and so be it.  Don’t force it.

I can’t remember where I read about this, it was ages ago, but the proponent said his proudest (and boldest) split was a line of nuns in Antwerp Cathedral.   So yes, I guess it helps if you’re a little bit strange.

Have fun!


About Disobedient Child

Digger, through and through. Also tagged as artist, crafter, voluntary worker, procrastinator View all posts by Disobedient Child

2 responses to “Splitters

  • Hels

    I do this a lot. The method is to summon the teacher within, and walk as if the crowd is merely the red sea waiting to part for a determined Moses. Great fun. Main application is for busy corridors at the start/end of break, but it can be applied to other situations too.


  • dilystreacle

    I’m going to try this, I hate being among crowds. Double points if you break up a hand holding couple? Triple points if you separate a parent and child!! ooh that last one’s a bit mean I s’pose!


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